The 800 Pound Gorilla In The Room

Ever been in a situation where there was an 800 pound gorilla in the room?

That's what I'm going through right now. (See yesterday's entry.) The problem is, I'm trying to solve the problem and get the gorilla out of the room, and so are the other individuals. But there is one person that wants to continue to avoid the issue.


Keep in mind that there is a cruise coming up in less than 30 days that ALL OF US ARE GOING TO BE ON.

To avoid any drama onboard the ship, we thought it would be a good idea to sit down and talk about what happened, vent, get it over with, and move on. Rather it happen here on land than in the middle of the ocean, right?

Guess our thinking is flawed.

Addendum: All three of us finally talked. Chris wants space. Fine, he shall get as much space as he wants. I'm leaving him alone and going on with the rest of my life.

End Transmission.


Darius T. Williams said...

Glad youre getting these issues resolved...now get them resolved and over with.

Ming Dynasty said...

Can I say something that I hope you won't take offensive???

I have been reading you for a long time...and I keep seeing these same situations replay over and over again in one variation or another. The only constant in all of them is you.

I know you have a lot on your plate. And I commend you for being an openly gay, HIV positive man that is not afraid to wear his shirt on his sleeve. BUT, in order to grow you have to take responsibility for your outcomes and stop blaming other people.

You seem to want to move to the next level, but you are holding yourself back. I know you'll read this and think the answer is to either get mad at me or drop other people from your life that you don't think are doing you any good, but the truth of the matter is...you are your own worst enemy.

You need to relax, enjoy life, stop and smell the roses. Stop being so petty. Deflect drama...don't invite it by text messaging with people you know you have no business talking too! Stop being so upset when a person doesn't immediately call you back, you know what I'm saying?

I read a lot of this stuff and I shake my head because I feel like I'm reading the manuscripts for Sweet Valley High or something...highschool.

You are a very spiritual person and your genuine desire for love and true friendship radiates off the screen. But, you have to protect yourself. You can't kick everyone to the curb because they don't jump for you AND you can't let everyone in your circle because they SAY they like you. The Devil is a liar and your insecurities make you an easy target for drama.

Trust! My life is no walk in the park and I practive everything I'm typing.

Just be careful and open your eyes. God loves you...stop putting your trust in man expecting them to do or be the supernatural...their human and they won't love you until you love yourself.

This comes from a good place, so please don't kick me off your page...You know how you are :-)

Ming Dynasty said...

Oh, by the way I moved back to Chicago a year ago...originally from Chicago..So, I know how hard it is out here for a Black woman...let alone a Black Gay Man...LOL!

Keep your head up and stop letting everyone so close to you. When you do that it will be easier to see who you can trust.

Some people only have one good friend, several close friends and a bunch of associates. There is nothing wrong with that. You seem like a great person. Be great!

This last situation...the couple who is texting you.

Why get invloved in that??? Can't you see the forest from the trees? Why deal with people that will do each other like that and Chris?? See if you were being right...you would have told Chris. That would have taken all blame off you. You would be the superhero. The couple would see your character and Chris would see your heart. It's okay to turn people away...that's enpowering. Now all you are is the victim. See I'm a skeptic. I would have been thinking I was being set-up when they started texting me. That alone would have made me disinterested.

You feel me???

Tim said...

Ming, I'm not going to kick you off my page because you make absolute sense. And you're right, I should have seen this coming.

But, if I may, allow me to suggest that there is a flaw to your logic on one thing, the "people-need-to-jump-for-me" theory. I tend to give people a LOT of leeway (more than I mention on here), and only tell people where to go after that leeway has lapsed.

True this is a blog, or "memoir" if you will. But I don't say EVERYTHING that happens. There is a method to my madness, believe me!

Thanks for the comments.

Ming Dynasty said...

We have to keep some things secret :-)

Thanks for being open to my bird's eyeview-esque opinion of your life.

ponoono said...

the flaw to ming's madness is that she accused you of wearing your shirt on your sleeve.

now if she had accused you of wearing your HEART on your sleeve i would have agreed

next she gonna accuse u of wearing your pants on top of your underwear !